Sweet Potatoes for Homespun Minimalists

Dear Reader,
The fine people at CSN Stores once again asked me to review some of the products they have on offer.  I don't know if you know this, but CSNStores.com sells just about everything.  So with all that to choose from, I picked something I have wanted - NEEDED - for a long time.  But that has not arrived yet, so you will have to wait to hear about it.

I had a little money left over and settled upon a potato ricer, it being close to Thanksgiving, and just about the only time of year I would have need for such an item.  I chose the ricer made by OXO, because I am a fan of their ergonometric designs - not great to look at, but easy and comfortable to use, which is what you want in a device that is meant to squash an entire potato.  

My children, being born of another planet, do not like mashed potatoes, so I picked up some sweet potatoes.  I stuck them in the microwave (who has time for baking potatoes?) till they were soft, removed the peel, and stuck them in the bowl of the ricer, which was not quite large enough for one of the giant sweet potatoes, but most likely the right size for a Yukon Gold.  One squeeze and I had a perfect, lovely, velvety bowl of mash.  Just right for today's recipe.

Sweet Potatoes for Homespun Minimalists

You will need:

Sweet Potatoes

Butter

Salt

Pepper

Maple Syrup

Nothing else.  Nothing.

Prick potatoes all over with a fork and bake in a 475 degree oven for an hour or until they are soft.  You could do this in a microwave, if you didn't think they took up too much space on your counter.  Mash potatoes, add butter, salt, pepper and a dash of maple syrup to remind you of Mom and knickknacks.  Enjoy.

So wrong, but so right!

Dear Reader,

Occasionally I come across something that makes me slap my forehead and shout, "Why didn't I think of that?"  The personal computer is one of these things, as are the internet and the Home Shopping Network.  Now I have a new item to add to the list.  I give you the Turkey Cake.

The folks at Chow.com have come up with this really disturbing, but probably totally delicious, Thanksgiving invention.  Two layers of ground turkey, layered with mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, stuffing and "iced" with more mashed potatoes, and then sweet potatoes topped with mini-marshmallows browned gently in the oven.  Absolute heaven.

Veteran's Day Recap

Dear Reader,

I wrote yesterday about my father, which was fitting, as he is a veteran, and it was Veteran's Day, and also because he was giving a speech at the opening ceremony for the NYC Veteran's Day parade, AND doing the commentary for the parade on NBC.  Big day!  Here's what went down.

Dad sharing some sly talk with Mayor Bloomberg.  Perhaps about the lovely princess in the front? She was actually Miss Haiti.  Is it comforting to know that with all Haiti's problems, they still made time to choose a beauty queen?

Governor Paterson always looks like he is pooping.

My father giving a rousing speech about welcoming home the new vets from Iraq and Afghanistan.  These kids are coming home to a bleak job market.  Sucks man!

Civil War Veteran speaks about his experience during the Battle of Appomattox.  Gruesome.

As a karate expert, I can't say too much about this picture because the rent is too damn high.  Jimmy McMillan seems to be listening for the sounds of a hungry baby.

Getting ready to zoom up 5th Ave on the back of a golf cart.  Definitely a highlight of the day for some of us, and absolutely terrifying for others.

That's my dad, on the left, sitting next to Chuck Scarborough.

My eight year old son: "Oh man! They are totally going to ruin that carpet."

Dudes on horses did not get nearly as much applause as...

the dudes cleaning up after them.

What happens when you let the six year old take the photos.

...yup...

He wasn't even mad when I spilled the Jelly Beans all over the bleachers.

Float representing some...companies...?

Second marine from the right is totally not paying attention. No chit chat on the parade route, son!

So typical... hiding behind the flag.

If you say the word "flag" ten times, really fast, it sounds like a word that might mean something else.  Like a "flag" would be a fat, lazy person, as in, "Where's my coffee?  This barista's such a flag."

Me and the girl on NBC.  I could tell you that the boy didn't mind that he wasn't on TV, but I would be lying.

Veteran's Day Pancakes for Dad

Dear Reader,

It is Veteran's Day here in America, a time when we say a big THANK YOU to all our service men and women.  As the proud daughter of a former Army Captain in the 101st Airborne (HOLLA) I offer you my father's apple pancakes.  Thanks, Dad.

Dad's Army Ranger Pancakes

You will need:
Pancakes
(I always use Nigella Lawson's recipe, but Dad uses Aunt Jemima's, and I have to admit, they are better)
Apples
Maple Syrup
Butter
Butter
More Butter
Cinnamon

Peel, core (is it really necessary to tell you to core them?  Would you ever leave the core in?) and chop apples and add a generous pat, more like a slab, of butter to a small saucepan.  Throw in the apples.  Cover them with a whole bunch of glugs of syrup, a pinch of cinnamon, and let them simmer.  Meanwhile, make the batter.  Add to the batter a dose of syrup.  Place another slab of butter into a hot pan.  Pour on the batter, adding the cooked apples.  When the pancake is ready to be flipped (when small bubbles are forming in the top) flip it over.  If you are quite deft, you can throw in more butter while the pancake is being flipped.  With the cooked side up, use your spatula to press down on the pancake, this will crisp up the edges and make them slightly caramelized.  Turn onto plate and top with more syrup.

Gross.

Just because something is old, does not make it vintage.

They're back, again? So soon?

Dear Reader,

You may recall the unexplained object hovering over my street a few weeks back.  Well it seems that someone may be trying to reach back.  So tell, me, are you a believer?  I'm packing my suitcase as I write this.  Not literally, that would be really difficult and awkward.  Besides, what to pack?

Eat Your Feelings Sandra Lee!

Dear Reader,

Some of you are thrilled with last night's election results, probably outside right now hiding in the bushes with your shotgun on the lookout for Muslims and "lazy black people" that are out to take your stuff.  Others are packing up your old college text books and back issues of the New Yorker and telling everyone you are heading for Canada (you'll never go, and anyway, they don't want you).  But whatever your politics, there is one thing you are undoubtedly excited for - Sandra Lee is the First Lady of New York State!  I am giddy with anticipation of the tablescapes she will be able to create in the Governor's Mansion!  Think of the myriad glasses in every shape, and size, and color in which she will concoct delicious ice-creamy cocktails.  Albany has no idea what is in store!  For Sandra Lee, Andrew Cuomo, and the residents of the capital district, I offer First Lady Martini, New York Style.  Cheers!

First Lady Martini, New York Style

You will need:
Vanilla Pudding
Grenadine
Blue Curacao
Graham Cracker crumbs

Lick the rim of your martini glass, the big one with the twisty, braided stem, but not the green one, and dip it gently in the graham crackers - crushed like the nuts of Carl Palladino.  Layer the bottom of the glass with vanilla pudding.  Pour on one dram of grenadine, and then float blue curacao on top.  Finish with a delightful Maple leaf collected from the lawn, and wonder what the heck Andrew is going to do, because the RENT IS STILL TOO DAMN HIGH.