Extremely Serious, No Joke Spiced Sweet Potato Casserole

Dear Reader,

November has been a hard month for my family.  First, the girl came down with a fever, which turned into a cough.  The doctor put her on antibiotics, and meanwhile, the husband came down with the same cough. The daughter's cough did not go away, which sent us back to the doctor, who diagnosed her with pneumonia.  Walking pneumonia, which is only slightly less dire that what these people have.  So more antibiotics, two inhalers, and the husband is still coughing because his doctor said he "just has a cough."  Just as the girl begins to improve, the boy starts coughing.  So for about a week everyone in the house is coughing, hard, loud, barking coughs pretty much 24 hours a day.  And the mom is both tired and frazzled, but not coughing, so that is good, because somebody has to take care of everyone, as we don't yet have a private nurse.

Then, two nights ago, I was at a reading of Wallace Shawn's work, and my neck started hurting.  I thought that it was perhaps due to the fact that I had been basically staring in one direction for two hours, but that doesn't make sense, does it?  By the time I got home, I was sick, sick, sick.  Apologies to the people sitting on either side of me at the reading.

Last night I put myself to bed just after the children, at eight o'clock, with not so much as a glass of wine, which is highly unusual for me.  Truthfully, I expected to have a nice cocktail of Nyquil, but someone threw it out thinking it was perhaps expired.  Unfortunately, eight o'clock was the precise time my downstairs neighbor decided would be perfect to bang out some Billy Joel on her piano.  It didn't last long, though and I slept ten hours straight, beset by dreams featuring mimes, John Cusak, Jaden Smith, Mick Jagger and Joe Biden.  Today I am still sick, but a bit better, and still making sweet potatoes.  Today I give you the recipe I will actually use for my family's Thanksgiving dinner, as having tried so very many, I know with certainty this one is the best.  It comes from a magazine, not sure which, as I tore out the page years ago, and it stays folded up inside my Martha Stewart Cookbook all year.  It might have been Cooking Light, or maybe Vegetarian Times, as it gives the full rundown of nutritional information.

Extremely Serious, No Joke Spiced Sweet Potato Casserole

You will need:

3 lbs sweet potatoes
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
2 Tbs. butter
2 Tbs. orange juice concentrate
1 1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. nutmeg
2 large eggs
1/4 cup chopped pecans

Cook the sweet potatoes either in the microwave or oven depending on the time you want to invest in this project.  Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Scoop the potato into a large bowl, add sugar, butter, OJ concentrate, cinnamon, salt and nutmeg.  Beat with a mixer at low speed.  Add eggs and beat until smooth.  Spoon into a baking dish - I will use a deep dish pie pan, and sprinkle with pagans, no not pagans, pecans, sprinkle with pecans.  Bake 45 minutes.  Can be made a day in advance, obviously, as I am making this right now and it is only Wednesday.

Sweet Potatoes for Unwanted Vegans

Dear Reader,

Every family has at least one.  They're at every Thanksgiving.  Vegans.  You can't make mashed potatoes, in my opinion, without butter and cream.  Likewise a proper stuffing is comprised mostly of butter and a little bit of sausage.  So what is left over for the vegans?  Cranberry sauce?  But what to put it on?  Here are some sweet potatoes that will satisfy even the most sanctimonious, patchouli-laden guest at your table.

Sweet Potatoes for Unwanted Vegans

You will need:
Sweet Potatoes
Orange
Cardamom
Salt
Pepper

Mash the sweet potatoes into a bowl resisting urge to smoke peels.  Squeeze on a little orange juice and mix in a dash of ground cardamom.  Season with salt and pepper.  Wash feet before sitting at table as that cheesy smell might go well with nutritional yeast dusted kale chips, but really ruins a freshly killed and roasted turkey.

Sweet Potatoes for Junkies

Dear Reader,

Every member of my family likes their sweet potatoes a different way, and I am sure your family is the same.  To satisfy all these many palates, I plan on offering you recipes for everyone at your table.  Today's version comes from my sister, who is NOT a junkie of the narcotic sort, but most definitely one of sugar.  No fear if the junkies in your family are more hard core, they will probably like this, too.  Enjoy!

Sweet Potatoes for Junkies

You will need:

Chewy Sweet Tarts
2 cans yams
1/2 box brown sugar
1 stick butter
1 bag marshmallows

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.  Place Chewy Sweet Tarts in microwave for 10 seconds to "loosen them up." Eat.  Open cans of yams.  Plop into a bowl and mash with a fork.  Melt butter in microwave and pour into potatoes.  Dump in half box brown sugar and stir, being careful to leave large chunks of brown sugar as special prizes inside mash.  Pour into large baking dish and spread.  Top with marshmallows - not mini-marshmallows, but the kind you can only fit three in your mouth at once, so that the ratio of marshmallow to sweet potato is roughly 2:1.  Bake until golden brown on top.  Brush teeth and make dental appointment.  If uninsured, have needle nosed pliers and bottle of whiskey on hand.

Sweet Potatoes for Homespun Minimalists

Dear Reader,
The fine people at CSN Stores once again asked me to review some of the products they have on offer.  I don't know if you know this, but CSNStores.com sells just about everything.  So with all that to choose from, I picked something I have wanted - NEEDED - for a long time.  But that has not arrived yet, so you will have to wait to hear about it.

I had a little money left over and settled upon a potato ricer, it being close to Thanksgiving, and just about the only time of year I would have need for such an item.  I chose the ricer made by OXO, because I am a fan of their ergonometric designs - not great to look at, but easy and comfortable to use, which is what you want in a device that is meant to squash an entire potato.  

My children, being born of another planet, do not like mashed potatoes, so I picked up some sweet potatoes.  I stuck them in the microwave (who has time for baking potatoes?) till they were soft, removed the peel, and stuck them in the bowl of the ricer, which was not quite large enough for one of the giant sweet potatoes, but most likely the right size for a Yukon Gold.  One squeeze and I had a perfect, lovely, velvety bowl of mash.  Just right for today's recipe.

Sweet Potatoes for Homespun Minimalists

You will need:

Sweet Potatoes

Butter

Salt

Pepper

Maple Syrup

Nothing else.  Nothing.

Prick potatoes all over with a fork and bake in a 475 degree oven for an hour or until they are soft.  You could do this in a microwave, if you didn't think they took up too much space on your counter.  Mash potatoes, add butter, salt, pepper and a dash of maple syrup to remind you of Mom and knickknacks.  Enjoy.