Showing posts with label Vodka. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Vodka. Show all posts

Friday, January 14, 2011

World's Best Curry For Friday Night

Dear Reader,

If you are anything like me, you got exactly what you wanted for Christmas this year, and that was a really great curry powder.  Of course you can make your own curry, but it is certainly handy to have one around that doesn't have too much turmeric, which I can't stand.  Curry can be used on many, many foods, like nachos for example.  Yes, nachos!  Mix a little curry, cumin, Old Bay and chili powder together, and lightly dust chips covered with a combination of monterey jack and white cheddar.  TRUST ME.

I wrote a while back about the world's best curry that I was craving, and here it is.  It is the perfect food for when you've had a long week.  Which I assuredly have!


WORLD'S BEST CURRY FOR FRIDAY NIGHT

You will need:

Feel-good music
Sweatpants
Wooly socks
Large sweatshirt
Cocktail
Olive oil
Butter
Garlic
Ginger
Chicken
Onion
Potato
Tomato Paste
Peas
Prunes
Chicken stock
Cream

Come home from whatever you do all week.  If you are a person like myself who works at home, then just stay where you are.  Turn off the phone, put away your Blackberry/iPhone/Walkie-Talkie, lock the door.  Play some music that makes you feel good.  This is at your discretion, but something along the lines of this:


Remove work clothes and put on sweatpants, wooly socks, and large sweatshirt, unless you work at home like me, in which case don't change anything.  Pour yourself a large cocktail.  How about a nice vodka with soda and a splash of LimeAid?  Easy!  

Chop the onion, potato, really whatever vegetables you like.  Pour oil into a hot pan and add butter and some curry powder.  Add some minced ginger and garlic.  Again, I'm not giving you measurements because it is Friday and I'm not going to boss you around.  Add a squeeze, or a spoonful of tomato paste, depending on whether you have a tube or a can.  Stir it around.  Put in cubed chicken breasts - if you want to use something else, fine!  Make it all veggie, use lamb, use Quorn Tenders, use the hamster you accidentally bought the kids for Christmas.  Everything is good in this curry.  Put the chicken into the pan to brown, add onions and potatoes.  If you like a lot of onions, use a lot.  If you hate them, throw them out the window.  When the onions are soft, add a glug or two of chicken stock.  Season with salt and pepper.  Throw in some frozen peas, unless you are a masochist, and then by all means shell your own damn peas!  Now add prunes.  You can just add a few, or a lot.  You can chop them small, but I like them whole and little less than one fourth the amount of prunes as chicken.  Simmer everything until you are confident it is all cooked, and the potatoes are soft, and the prunes are kind of falling apart.  Add a swig of cream.  Stir it around.  Simmer again for a bit.  Serve over rice.

Park yourself in front of the television and watch whatever you like to watch.  For me that would be the best show on television, I Shouldn't Be Alive, which makes me feel less guilty that I am sitting in front of the tv in my comfy pants eating curry, and not out trying to sail around the world with my children or trek through the Amazon by myself, followed by Intervention which reminds me that even though I may be on my third vodka with LimeAid, at least I'm not drinking the Listerine.


Monday, September 27, 2010

Drink Your Feelings

Dear Reader,
I have had another letter, this time from Samantha in Portland, Maine.

"...I quit my job when I had kids, thinking it was best for them that I stay home. But now they're in school and I'm home by myself with nothing to do but housework. Am I really going to spend my life cleaning? I need something to take away my boredom."

Samantha, you are certainly not alone, the tediousness of taking care of children (and husbands) has led many women to turn to Mommy's Little Helper, aka Vodka. Cheers.


Bored Housewife



You will need:

Swiffers
Vodka
Duct tape
Dance Music
Pickled Onions

After dropping kids at school, swing by liquor store for a quart of vodka. Make sure to say, “It’s for later,” at the checkout. Say it at least three times, loudly, so that everyone in the store will hear you. Once home, pour three jiggers vodka in a large tumbler. Put on dance music from the 80’s such as Duran Duran, Soft Cell or Dexy's Midnight Runners.

Place two Swiffers on floor and use duct tape to fashion into shoes. Drop several pickled onions into vodka and, if desired, a small amount of brine. Drink while dancing around house cleaning floors. If you should catch sight of yourself in mirrors, add two more jiggers vodka to glass before calling stay-at-home dad next door over for a game of seven minutes in heaven.